I had a dream that i was pregnant. It felt so real. In my little white dress, and my hands on my belly.
I felt so special and pretty, a feeling that a model will never feel despite all the runways...
Maybe it was the way i was treated by people around me. I was on a new level.
Maybe it was the way the drivers would stop their cars even before i had my right foot on the road. Maybe it was the way people will give way on a busy street . Maybe it was how the driver would turn down the volume when i got in the loud matatu.
Maybe it was the way he opened the door for me and pulled a chair for me. So i sat there thinking about him, the father of my unborn baby. Back to reality, am not pregnant, it must be my hormones playing tricks on me when i am sleeping.
Google has many definitions on marriage. I have never come across a positive one.
If not two people who are inlove with each other seeking a paper proof that they can legally live together then it is loving each other even in those days when you are trying so hard to like each other.
Another will jokingly say that marriage is taking care of a big baby whose parents are already tired of.
Back to my views... why do we get married?
Is it because we are of age, or we fell inlove, or it is the pressure from parents, is it that our friends have already settled, or how the society has raised us, or it is the sex we need, or we just want kids, is it for the money, or he just wants to hide his homosexuality behavior, maybe it's the church, or the promises he made...i don't know.
It is always the woman who looks forward to be wifed up. Maybe because she was raised to aspire to marriage, or maybe she is just an emotional being who desperately needs love from a man, or maybe her womb desperately needs to carry babies or maybe it is that one ex who cursed her to be single forever and so she wants to prove him wrong.
Despite everything it is always the woman who tries her best to be a "wife material " and even if she succeeds, she still has to maintain that marriage.
What about the man? He only marries when he wants to. Marriage is not his goal. You will find him at 40, single, living life, he doesn't worry like she does.
Is he not intrested? I don't know but maybe, just maybe, maybe it is the fact that he will stay fertile forever, or maybe his boys are just too cool to be replaced by one single crazy girl, or maybe the nude photographs in his gallery are just enough to satisfy his lust, or maybe he is broke, or maybe he is made to believe that women only want money, or maybe it is the many heartbreaks he had in the past, is he still waiting for Maureen to notice him, or he is waiting for Lydia to turn 18, or his mother won't let him go... and i don't want to know.
What happens after marriage? Don't ask me either, but i was never told how heavenly marriage could be. Men can't multitask,so he pauses his career and gets a wife.
Women don't know this.
So after the honeymoon he needs to go back to work, so he can provide for his wife and make her happy. She starts missing the 'quality time' they always had. He goes out at 6:00 am to avoid traffic, he comes back home at 8:00 pm because he was caught up in traffic. He is never free on weekends, even on public holidays. His job won't allow him.
She misses all the dates they used to go. He is too tired to even listen to her. It is now two years and his mother visits. His wife can't get along with his mother.
All this is followed by two years of fighting.
A one year old kid is caught up in this mess. The 'two' are thinking of divorce but they keep delaying signing the papers.
Maybe because he promised forever, or she promised she will stay in good and bad times.
So y'all left the good times during courtship and spend your bad days in marriage.
Why y'all make marriage seem like a life long imprisonment? Why don't y'all just date forever if that is the only way you two could stay happy and inlove...