Everywhere you look, there’s compelling evidence that the single-minded pursuit of wealth often leads smart people to do incredibly stupid things — things that destroy what money can’t buy.
I ask myself the same questions. How is it that brilliant people with more money than they’ll ever need allow their hunger for even more money to cause them to lose everything? How much is enough, and why are people willing to risk so much to get more? If money is so alluring, how is it that so many people of great wealth also seem so unhappy?
Just about everyone has a complicated relationship with money.
The average Kenyan seemed to suffer from a money disorder.
Money disorders are persistent patterns of self-destructive and self-limiting financial behaviors.
They result from distorted beliefs about money we develop from our financial flashpoint experiences.
Whether it's a childhood of poverty or want, a message about money subconsciously internalized from a parent, a nest egg lost to an economic downturn later in life, or someone rushing in at the last moment to save the economic day, everyone has experienced a financial flashpoint in their lives.
Categories of money disorders
Money Avoidance Disorder
Financial Denial: When, rather than face financial reality, we try to minimize money problems by refusing to think about them all together.
Financial Rejection: The experience of guilt whenever money, of any amount, is accrued. People with low self-esteem are particularly prone to this disorder, and it leads to a whole host of financial and psychological troubles.
Hoarding: When stockpiling objects or money provides a sense of safety, security, and relief of anxiety.
Compulsive Buying: Compulsive buying is overspending on steroids. Compulsive shoppers are consumed by their money worries. They often learned, early in life, that the ritual of shopping provides a temporary escape from worry and anxiety.
Relational Money Disorders
Financial Infidelity: Telling "little green lies" about one's spending or finances to one's partner, like making purchases outside an agreed-upon budget or lying about the cost of a big-ticket item.
Financial Enabling: Giving money to others whether you can afford it or not; giving when it is not in the other's long-term best interest; having trouble or finding it impossible to say no to requests for money; and/or even sacrificing one's own financial wellbeing for the sake of others.
The negative side of money.
Studies show that money is the no. 1 reason for divorce in the early years of marriage and a common area of conflict for couples.
More money, less empathy.
“A lot of what we see is a baseline orientation for the lower class to be more empathetic and the upper class to be less.
Lower-class individuals have to respond chronically to a number of vulnerabilities and social threats. You really need to depend on others so they will tell you if a social threat or opportunity is coming and that makes you more perceptive of emotions.
Wealth can cloud moral judgment.
where the law requires that cars stop at crosswalks for pedestrians to pass -- drivers of luxury cars were four times less likely than those in less expensive vehicles to stop and allow pedestrians the right of way. They were also more likely to cut off other drivers.
Wealth has been linked with addiction.
Affluent children are more vulnerable to substance abuse issues , potentially because of high pressure to achieve and isolation from parents. in adulthood, the rich outdrink the poor by more than 27 percent.
Money itself can become addictive.
in this case, an addiction to the good feeling that comes from receiving money or possessions -- which can ultimately lead to negative consequences and harm the individual's well-being. Addiction to spending money -- sometimes known as shopaholism -- is another, more common type of money-associated process addiction.
Wealthy children may be more troubled.
Children growing up in wealthy families may seem to have it all, but having it all may come at a high cost. Wealthier children tend to be more distressed than lower-income kids, and are at high risk for anxiety, depression, substance abuse, eating disorders, cheating and stealing.
We tend to perceive the wealthy as "evil."
On the other side of the spectrum, lower-income individuals are likely to judge and stereotype those who are wealthier than themselves.
While a lack of resources fosters greater emotional intelligence, having more resources can cause bad behavior in its own right.
But don't let your beliefs about money keep you from living a prosperous life because wealth is the ability to fully experience life.